Uncertainty

There are moments in life where we don't know what the next week will bring. Where our next paycheck is coming from, or if a loved one will recover from an accident or illness. Time's of uncertainty can be extremely stressful, energetically sapping, and very scary for some, especially If you're the kind of person who enjoys a stable, predictable, and well-planned lifestyle.

I have been, in more than one way, a product of near-constant uncertainty. My family moved from place to place in the U.S for the first 12 years of my life. I think the longest we ever stayed in the same house up till then was 3 years. Not long enough to integrate into a community and actually begin to feel a sense of belonging, which is critical for growing children.

We moved through 6 states and at least 12 houses. Heck, we were better at moving then we were at staying put. After the initial buzz of moving to a new place fades away, you're left with the stark reality of real life. Real solid, stuck, boring, and hard life. The 9-5 dread. The drama of actual relationships lasting decades, scarred, and bitter, yet somehow still functioning(or dysfunctioning). We never dealt with this part, we had each other, and for some reason or another we always ended up moving before ever getting to it. We nearly did. We stayed nearly 3 years straight in a small town in Mississippi nearly 25 minutes drive from a small Krsna farm. We made friends, our parents made friends. We got used to the place. We got used to the people. They got used to us. It was nice to feel like maybe there would be a future there. Sadly, or more typically, the inspiration to leave all that behind came suddenly in the form of an intense and vivid dream my father had of A.C Bhaktivedanta Swami asking him to move us all to India, to Mayapur, the birthplace of Sri Chaitanya. He woke up in the middle of the night and told my mother "Honey, we are moving to India" and that was that. 

Less than 6 months later, we packed up all of our belongings, put them into storage containers(which were later destroyed by hurricanes) and flew off to India. An already disgruntled, gypsy-like family of 6 kids flying off to one of the craziest and unknown places in the world, we were oddly enough, ready. We were excited. We were together. We had each other. We didn't know a lot of things. We didn't know what the future held at all. However, what we learned after years and years of travelling, of moving, and of constant change, is this...There is only one way to cope with uncertainty in life. 

Keep smiling. 

It is the difference between an adventure and a tragedy.

#Jainitai